My Least Favorite Word Ever | #VLOGMAS 08

This word is so irritating when I hear it, and it’s irritating when I say it. Ugh. It’s my least favorite word ever!

You might be surprised to hear that I don’t mind the word no. I like the word no, and I’m trying to improve my relationship with the word no. I like when people tell me no, even though I secretly wonder why they didn’t say yes. I struggle with saying no, but it’s getting better.

My least favorite word ever is the word should.

Why?

First, I hate this word because of a discovery I recently made within myself: when people say the word should to me, (i.e. “you should do this” or “you should make this”), I’ve always felt a huge pushback. When this word comes up, there seems to be a world of distance between this person I’m in conversation with and myself.

I recently figured out through Gretchen Rubin’s quiz that I’m a questioner. Her philosophy is to leverage who you are and use your natural strengthens to work with you, not against you.

I’m not just going to do things; I need to understand why. I only hold myself accountable when something needs to be done. Tasks need to make sense to me.

Second, we’re always using this word instead of doing something else or reframing the idea in a new way. How many times have you said, “I should go ask for a raise.” or “I should tell that person how I really feel.” or “I should exercise.”?

This word is used all the time and too many times we’re using it to in the form of negative self-talk.

Don't let the word SHOULD impact you in a negative way. It's not worth it. #vlogmas Click To Tweet

It gives you a way of rationalizing why you may or may not be doing something. You can justify that at least you know even if you aren’t doing it. All things don’t work for all people. All people don’t want to live up to your expectations. I, personally, need to do things the way I think they need to be done.

Think a little more about how others are talking. How are you talking to yourself? How are you holding yourself accountable? No matter what, you may need to adjust instead of should-ing all day long.

It’s ok if you’re not doing something someone else said you should. You are figuring it out, and you’re going to get to the point where you know what works for you.

Keep figuring it out to go after the life you want.